The Elite Forum
Nonsense Time => FFA => Topic started by: SimThreat on April 02, 2009, 09:38:00 pm
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1. His mum has hairy balls
2. His mum should shave her balls
3. I suggested to her that she should shave her balls but she didn't listen
4. This made me get mad and attempt to shave them while she was sleeping
5. She woke up during and I couldn't finish so now she has one ball that is hairy and the other that is awesome
6. She was mad that I attempted to shave her balls but I told her everything was going to be ok and she should relax
7. I put the shaven testicle into my mouth and it felt fantastic. This was much better than a hairy ball
8. She started to rub my clit and my vagina started to get moist
9. Ryan came into the room because he was having nightmares about hot women (he is afraid of them)
10. He said he wanted to sleep in his mum's bed because he was scared. We agreed and decided not to have sex because Ryan was there, though I did sneak off to the toilet at one stage during the night to have a bat
CASE CLOSED.
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I was expecting better, it would have been funnier if Nolan were involved.
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It's ok Ryan, the hot women are only in your dreams. They'll never come near you in real life, you don't have to worry.
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owned
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That's a lie. If you want to know, I've watched David Deangelo Deep Inner Game and read The Game by Neil Strauss while observing and meditating about the information in these. I believe that once things come together, such as going back up north to work and live on my own this summer, I will be able to start to experience at least some more new interactions with women. Ye of little faith, I guarantee you I fuck at least a 7/10 by Labour Day 2009.
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I would be very happy for you if you did. All you need to do is get over your fear of hot women.
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I'm not afraid of hot women.
If you want to know what I'm scared of, I will tell you.
When you introduce yourself, you have a commitment you just made. This commitment involves talking to this person like a normal human being, respecting their rights and not being a dick unless they are being a dick. Let's say I introduce myself to a woman to see what she is like, and as it turns out she's alright, but not what I am looking for. What happens if she likes me a lot and wants to hang out with me? The same goes for guys... what if they are weird but they want to be my friend? This fear of having to put up with people I don't like is what hinders me the most.
I know it's ridiculous because I blow off people all the time, but this is the main thing keeping me from getting to know many people.
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That's fine, I don't believe you though.
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Sad, Goose.
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Most people think it's sad, but personally I don't see anything sad about not settling for any random girl; rather being patient until you meet the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. If there were more people like me, there would be far less divorce and domestic issues.
Why date a girl you know you won't go anywhere with? It seems wasteful.
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4 the secks <3
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We weren't talking about meeting people you wanted to marry, we were talking about just meeting new people in general. Just because you meet someone doesn't mean you're going to sleep with them or become their best friend the next day. You have to learn to chill out and live life. Loosen up, you're bound to meet some really top dudes, some really shit blokes and same goes for women.
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I do chill. I'm the most relaxed person I know. I'm the only one who doesn't care about "real life" because I know that I will be able to graduate, get a good job, make a good living, find my wife, etc, without having to work for it. I just chill 24/7... it's great.
Yet I don't meet people.
Mind you, a lot of that has to do with me not going out, but it's not like you can go out to a bar or club when all of your friends are 100 miles away for college. When the summer comes around, things will be different... they always are.
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Most people think it's sad, but personally I don't see anything sad about not settling for any random girl; rather being patient until you meet the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. If there were more people like me, there would be far less divorce and domestic issues.
Why date a girl you know you won't go anywhere with? It seems wasteful.
*Applauds*
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because it could be fun tyler? its not like girls are on this world just to marry them.
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I'm 100% sure that there are more fun things than sex, therefore from an economic standpoint, it is most efficient if you do these things which are more fun, when you want to have fun.
Sex probably is great... everyone in the world can't be wrong, but for the most part girls are lame and only want your penis in their vagina, which is difficult to believe, but regardless they will do anything to get you to fuck them and only people who are as good as me at everything are able to fend them off.
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You help the economy, I'll help myself.
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I'm not talking about "the economy." I'm talking about personal economics not involving money. You know the true definition of economics has nothing to do with money? Money is just how we represent value in today's society.
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your fucking 20 years old or 19 or some shit and you are looking for a girl you want to spend the rest of your life with? are you fucking joking me you should do that when your like 30 something or close to your 40s. you need to get out there and actually get experience with a girl cause with the way you talk you make it sound like that you know what your doing and your trying to find the perfect girl. You first need to get experience with talking to girls then you can proceed to higher things. you act like your just gonna find a girl thats perfect and you be with her... well you gotta talk to her first and get to know her thats why you need to get out there and hang out with all kinds of girls and get a few under your belt sex wise. what happens when your about to have sex with a girl who you are sure of is the "one" who most likely wont be a virgin and you are just sitting there probably cant get it up or some shit, have no idea what your doing(positions and foreplay). You will look like an idiot infront of the girl who you think is the "one" and WHY? because you were being a stubborn idiot earlier in your life by not listening to your friends who were telling you to out with girls have some fun get laid and get experience.
Honestly you are digging your own fucking grave(and dont tell me "i know what im doing" and "i dont care if it seems like im digging my own grave")
lets wait til they make the 50 year old virgin you can be the star
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honestly you probably wont even be able to find your "perfect girl" you dont have any experience its a fucking fact.
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I have lots of experience with talking to girls, just not the "higher things" because deep in my heart, I don't truly want them.
You don't need to have a few kills at hand before you can meet your perfect girl. That is just nonsensical.
Lol @ me not being able to get it up... I get rock hard if I see a hot girl walking around with her thong out. I'm a fucking dog. If anything my problem is more likely to be prematuring.
I don't care if I look like an idiot in front of "the one" because if she's truly the one then these tiddly issues won't be of any importance. Besides, I'm a fast learner, spend a day fucking and I'll be as good as your average joe who's only fucked 3 girls in drunken nights... is that really much better?
We'll see who's first by the end of our lives.
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honestly you probably wont even be able to find your "perfect girl" you dont have any experience its a fucking fact.
I can spot girls who fit into my range of "perfect girl" from a mile away.
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Let me ask you this Lockerboxer.
First time losing virginity.
Which of the following would be the best scenario? Order them.
a) I lose my virginity to a drunken college girl not knowing what I'm doing after a fucktarded night of partying. She's obviously confused that I have no idea what I'm doing and is pissed. Not a good experience.
b) I have sex with a nice, younger girl who also isn't very experienced, though moreso than myself and she understands my issues and helps me out. Because of my age, I have status over her and it's less awkward.
c) I find another 19 year old beautiful virgin and we share our love and moments with each other for months and then after we know that for sure we were born for each other we make beautiful love under a Venetian sunset.
d) A hooker.
It sure sounds like b and c are a hell of a lot better than a and d. Any suggestions?
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spotting your perfect girl from a mile is one thing... Getting her is another thing. The getting is the part i think you will have trouble with
C B A D for the order of the scenarios
you most likely wont be able to find C because at this age girls are to young and they do not know what they want or whats best for them. They just like going out and having fun(sex is one of those activitys of fun). It would be almost near impossible to find a beautiful 19 year old virgin and we all know it. to many guys would have jumped on her already trying to get with her. Girls are sluts themselves man... They wanna fuck they all have an inner whore i swear all of them do.
and plz dont argue with me about how likely it would be to find a 19 year old virgin that is beautiful. Im just trying to tell you the facts about what is going on.
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i didnt see your other reply to my other post. You say all these things like your a fast learner and stuff and how those other things wont be a problem... Just wait man just wait. you wont become The Sex Master in one night like you say you woluld now that is just stupid to say. thats the thing i can get kinda mad about you act like you know everything about it and yet you havent really done much you know? You act like your plan is going to go perfectly and you will show us all up. Well i got news it is not and i promise you that.
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Possibly the Worst Topic Ever! (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Fsick.gif&hash=147d83ab69333060437ede2e0058676600b3ea8c)
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Goose is the ass master
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Ok, so I have a few things to say then;
Why do kids graduate from university in engineering and expect that they can do everything and know everything to get a great job? Are they wrong? If we accept they are wrong, I accept that I am wrong about my sex aptitude. This serves nothing but to bash education.
Futhermore, you're correct about me not talking to these girls I see everywhere who fit what I want.
I'm also aware that the odds of finding another 19 year old virgin are next to none but that's ok, I'm used to dealing with terrible odds, and if she's fucked a few dicks in her life, I won't mind too much. After all, girls are just stupid whores who don't know any better. It's not "her" fault for fucking these guys... it's society's fault for having sex with her.
Lastly, my plan is going to go perfectly. I'm one of those people who has everything work out for them in life. This will be no different.
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Lockwood man, what on earth are you talking about? Sure it's good to get out and talk to girls, it's good to interact in social situations, I agree with that. Then you somehow transition to "You need to have sex with a few girls too." Pardon me but what? Why? Where did this come into the picture? If Goose finds "the one" that girl won't care if he fumbles around in bed for a little while. I agree with needing to know what's going on, what's involved in a relationship, how to treat the girl, what to expect, etc. But I get sick of people then bringing sex in and saying you need to be at least a little sexually experienced before you meet the one, because it quite simply makes no sense. Also not everyone should wait until they're 30 to look for a wife, I know some happily married people who were married when they were teenagers, never had sex with anyone else and love each other.
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what do you mean what on earth am i talking about? me saying that you need to get a little sexual experience is fine. It's your opinion that you dont and not a lot of people back that opinion. I mean what the fuck do i know right? Fuck it i cant deal with this anymore im sorry i even started up the argument My Apologies. Just do what the fuck you want and youll see.
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"Possibly the Worst Topic Ever! "
POSSIBLY? (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Fsmile.gif&hash=1adea417e08e9042f9ce1a5426616bf29f2ca20e)
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This is nowhere near the worst topic ever. Look in General Chat for the ones titled "My Brute" and the current topic of the week for far worse topics... and that's just on the first page of GC.
Not to mention the prediction and fantasy topics aren't exactly stellar.
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Lockwood reminds me a lot of Clemens... his posts make him seem like he's on crack or something. who knows... maybe he is! (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Ftongue.gif&hash=7cfc888ebd66cf455a55fd5e124ee8267da91148)
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what a a dumb ignorant statement
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Afan reminds me of that loser from high school, who pretends to like everything everyone else likes just to be accepted.
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:O that actually sounds a lot like me! (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Fsmile.gif&hash=1adea417e08e9042f9ce1a5426616bf29f2ca20e)
keep up the good work gents! (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Fwink.gif&hash=4979046fbfc7ed25a03644bf608e503c4aa73f0f)
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A B C D
if you had hindsight.
It SEEMS like C would be best... but you'd prob look back at it and go "pfft, gay".
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So a hooker really is that bad? And neither of you are saying that my ephebophilia is a bad thing? Wow, this thread is now full of win (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Fsmile.gif&hash=1adea417e08e9042f9ce1a5426616bf29f2ca20e)
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I'm having a bout of ephebophilia myself actually, so nah it's not a bad thing (IMO!). Just finished with a 19er and going out with an 18er today (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Fsmile.gif&hash=1adea417e08e9042f9ce1a5426616bf29f2ca20e)... Though i'd never fall in love with one.
Funny-ish story about hookers. Last time I had weed I must have spent 30 minutes fantasizing about going to a prostitute whilst high (cos it's really hard to get a chick that smokes weed) and I'd convinced myself that I was gonna do it. Then when I snapped out of it I was like "wtf gross". Never go to a hooker eww!
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I'm having a bout of ephebophilia myself actually, so nah it's not a bad thing (IMO!). Just finished with a 19er and going out with an 18er today (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Fsmile.gif&hash=1adea417e08e9042f9ce1a5426616bf29f2ca20e)... Though i'd never fall in love with one.
Funny-ish story about hookers. Last time I had weed I must have spent 30 minutes fantasizing about going to a prostitute whilst high (cos it's really hard to get a chick that smokes weed) and I'd convinced myself that I was gonna do it. Then when I snapped out of it I was like "wtf gross". Never go to a hooker eww!
^ ... and this thread is officially full of GTFO EPIC FAIL! (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Ffrown.gif&hash=9bb8520656650a7c2457ae0ae2ee8996e4109fd6)
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(https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Flaugh.gif&hash=657f1346088ce2081c398c7379c3a47e4cf5861b) yeah that was a little disgusting (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Fsick.gif&hash=147d83ab69333060437ede2e0058676600b3ea8c)
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Yeah dude, it's unfortunate about the weed thing. I would absolutely love to get baked as fuck, have sex, and then lay on the bed for an hour listening to psychedelic music... I know a few girls who smoke weed and are mega into sex but come on, it is me we're talking about (https://forums.the-elite.net/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ezboard.com%2Fintl%2Faenglish%2Fimages%2Femoticons%2Ftongue.gif&hash=7cfc888ebd66cf455a55fd5e124ee8267da91148)