The Elite Forum
Nonsense Time => FFA => Topic started by: Grav on January 28, 2018, 02:18:02 pm
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This thread is for sincere, forthright discussions for the purpose of improving ourselves in how we act with and around each other.
There are two main goals for this thread:
1. People post what they feel they do that could be annoying/triggering to others and their plan to try and improve
2. People remark honestly and tactfully about something another person does that angers or annoys them, in a genuine attempt to improve relations with them
Maybe this thread will die but I think the idea could be really helpful. A place to have to direct our frustrations at instead of discord PMs and behind the back shit talking could be invaluable. Please do not argue in this thread... if you strongly disagree with someone's perception of what you do then just politely say so.
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Even though this is in FFA where the rules of engagement are a bit relaxed, I'll play. What have I got to lose?
1. People post what they feel they do that could be annoying/triggering to others and their plan to try and improve
‣ Occasionally in a PUBG match with Nate on my team, I'll just go totally mute on the mic for 20 minutes until he does something really dumb in frustration. I probably shouldn't do it but it's just so fun and the results are always great so....we'll see. Maybe I'll do it again anyway. Some of my most memorable moments have come from this but for Nate they might be the most...unforgettable.
‣ I regularly bring up touchy conversation subjects with Jimbo. Typically 2 to 5 times per month. I still believe I have his best interests in mind but it's also clear he's really set on his own ideas in almost every case. I could stop and just let him be but it's also hard to see him show up complaining about something that didn't go his way.
‣ Sometimes I hold my tongue rather than giving information to assist a friend in conversation for fear that my information is not correct. It can be very frustrating for the other party but I am usually too shy to speak up or afraid of being very wrong. I can try to hedge my positions with qualifiers like "I think" but that also detracts from the value of any answer I give.
‣ I'm not sure if the long, incessant, repetitive chat monologues irritate people or not. I almost always do them with a huge grin on my face assuming 95% of people will just see it as a wall of text to scroll past....but I've been doing it for over 10 years so it would be silly to stop now. I guess if people complained more often I'd probably think about changing the subjects, length, or frequency. There just aren't that many complaints...like once a year or less.
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Well im gonna put myself on the line here, hopefully more will too
Things I do that are probably annoying to others:
- I am very passionate in debates sometimes and will fail to control emotions, leading me to namecall and use caps when I shouldnt be
- I probably jump at the chance to argue too often, sometimes it really just is a small thing that wont snowball into something worse
- I try to change too many things too quickly when it would likely be better to give more time to think through all the possibilities
- I probably spend too much time on discord which leads me to repeat my strong opinions on random topics like PD pausing too much
Things other people do that I would like to mention:
Ace -
I really honestly like having you around and I think you understand this in how much effort I'm trying to go through to get you to MOAM and have it happen at all. I just think you could be a lot better if you had a more clear grasp of how your actions affects others. Like come on, you have to know how much people are getting tired of the Luke, stuff or whatever. You are capable of so many relevant contributions if you just focused your energy to that instead. Of course not entirely your fault because nobody else says anything when they are annoyed because of you but me, so that is kind of the point of this thread. I want nothing more than to be friendly with you and everyone, so consider this the first olive branch in that pursuit.
Ragequit -
You poke people a bit too much when they have an obvious "poke me here" button. Karl with ego, me with doom being shit, anyone else for caring about something at all, among some other stuff. It's honestly not that big of a deal but I guess it something that can build up over time and make me or a few others have a worse feeling towards you than we should (its not bad now, but it just could be better).
Goose -
The exaggeration and hyperbole are a bit too much sometimes. Like when its obvious you have been bested whether in an argument or in the game, you have to always be even more over the top for a while before you finally speak candidly about what everyone actually knows is true. Idk its not that big of a deal to me because I know when you are doing this, but so many others are so bad at detecting it that it would probably help a lot if you just dropped the charade when the jig is up, so to speak.
Flicker -
I dont want you to think I actually dislike you although we do disagree on a ton of things. I get the feeling you probably dont like me that much and thats fine, i probably deserved it with how much i shit on pausing and LTK and what not. I do think you are a bit too sensitive about it and LTK in general though. Like if you are going to be the banner carrier for a side category, you have to be able to take the shit people will give you for running it as your main category, especially when you promote your times as much as those who do in normal mode. You have to understand that like no matter what people will always consider LTK to not be as relevant so it will affect how they perceive you etc. There is a place for everyone though and I'm glad you found yours, so more power to you in your pursuits.
Karl -
You have many discussions and arguments where people have gained a lot from it when they have had faulty logic that you point out, but sometimes theres situations where there is very clearly nothing to gain whether it be because the other person is proving very obviously that they will not listen or the topic is so mundane/irrel that its not really worth having except for arguing for the sake of it. I guess I wish you pulled back a bit more in these situations. When the topic is relevant or you think you can make progress in clearing up someone's misunderstanding, then by all means keep at it. I just think these lesser tier arguments are the ones that annoy more people which can contribute to the pushback towards you from the usual suspects.
Spagooda -
I think you are too nice for your own good and it is not necessarily the best trait for an admin that has to rule over a place that routinely gets invaded by trolls and idiots. Being too strict is also bad too of course, I don't want that either. I suppose I wish you were just more willing to at least make the threat of some punishment especially in clear cases where the majority of the community wants it to happen. I'm not quite sure what happened with discord names either, because like I was under the impression that most people wanted the actual display name to resemble the person in question in some form yet that rule from you only was for the hidden username... so then like what is the point lol. Name abuse hasnt been as bad lately so I guess its not that big of a deal anymore but it could be later again.
Boss -
Please stream
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Goose - Bring back the mirrors
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Ragequit -
You poke people a bit too much when they have an obvious "poke me here" button. Karl with ego, me with doom being shit, anyone else for caring about something at all, among some other stuff. It's honestly not that big of a deal but I guess it something that can build up over time and make me or a few others have a worse feeling towards you than we should (its not bad now, but it just could be better).
you're right, i'll work on it
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I will use this as my improvement progress post. Here are the things I'm aware of which are bad:
- Posting "Luke," in the server lobby multiple times per day.
Ace's solution: I will relieve myself by posting "Luke," in the #time-out channel when need be. This should not bother anyone. There may be a couple of instances where I might *accidentally* post in the lobby, so please forgive me if this happens once every week or fortnight. I will try my best to not do this.
- Not making the Dam Secret Agent tutorial.
Ace's solution: Admitting the Dam SA tutorial will not be made until at least 2020. Let's put an end to this meme once and for all. Henceforth anyone making a meme out of this should be kicked out of the Discord for at least 30 minutes.
Promising something and not going through with it (streaming, etc)
Ace's solution: I will never provide a concrete answer to anything whenever asked (I've realized being vague is healthier in certain cases, such as here). therefore any time someone asks me something, I will try to be as vague as possible UNLESS I have a definite answer.
Calling people idiots, retards, etc
Ace's solution: will think of one later
NOW
Ace's problems with others:
ceebs to finish this post