The Elite Forum
The Big Three Plus One => General Chat => Topic started by: Lumiinosity on May 16, 2019, 09:51:43 am
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Have any of you guys ever had a really bad breakup that affected you for a long time?
I mean more than a few weeks of “ugh this sucks”
Maybe losing a long term girlfriend/boyfriend or even your wife/husband ?
If so how did you deal with it?
We all know its a hard situation, but has any real damage been done to your life’s structure because of a break up?
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Not myself, but there are people here whose lives have been seriously impacted by relationship issues. Think "multiple years" or "a decade" to get an idea of how bad this can hurt someone.
If you need someone to talk to about your own situation, don't be afraid to reach out to those you trust.
I don't think the first line of your post is necessary. What does it add to the conversation? It would probably be better for everyone to just leave out crude "jokes".
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Not myself, but there are people here whose lives have been seriously impacted by relationship issues. Think "multiple years" or "a decade" to get an idea of how bad this can hurt someone.
decade? move out of your mothers house and start not being a child ffs. (I realize that's harsh but when I hear that I immediately realize that person badly needs a kick in the ass)
There's a few generalities with these things--one of the biggest ones is don't invest more into a relationship than her.
The main thing with breakups is she moved on and if you don't she wins and you're not gonna let her win are you?
Sure it sucks, but there's billions of other women out there and she's not more special than any of the rest of them. When you get older you'll realize such things and how silly you were being fixated on THAT girl and all that.
(caveat I don't have kids/never married so I haven't gotten the old wife leaves you thing but statistically that's gonna happen so you just have to go into it realizing that's a possibility--and being a man that you are--be okay with it when it happens)
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I consider myself an extremely loyal person, to the point where I will do everything possible to remain so even if (to an objective viewpoint) it would have been better to cut my losses.
I have been happily married for 8 years but there was a breakup prior to that which still causes me sorrow. The person wasn't intentionally malicious but it still hurts 10 years later. For me, dealing with it required a lot of prayer and a lot of intentional moving forward. I buried myself in my Master's degree and job and continued actively looking for a spouse.
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**edit** You probably don't want them to come back (granted that's the situation). As difficult as it may seem there are most likely lessons to be learned about life and yourself. It took me to go through what we are labeling heartache to learn about myself. I used to be a real loose cannon in many ways. Grateful I am for these experiences. Took me long enough lol
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I had one recently that lasted a month.
Of course, I wasn't the one who broke up with this girl, she broke up with me. It sucks, but it was one of those things that I needed. I didn't realize how dark of a place I was really in. Her breaking up with me woke me up in a sense. Made me realize that I was putting off my dreams for her, instead of working hard during the relationship.