Longest post by wouter?
Let's see. 2001. Well, I started playing Perfect dark a long time ago; probably sometime during 2001. However, I'm not sure if I knew about the elite until 2002, therefore, chances are, I probably didn't know about t-e.n yet. Which means, I obviously wasn't around to read wouters super-duper lengthy post from hell. However, I could search for it; chances are, it's in the Goldeneye topics. But, there are so many topics! All the dead ones at the bottom of the list of forums; there's got to be over 10 of them, with like 19 pages each, damn that's a lot! But you see, someone out there probably felt it was necessary to save the link to this lengthy post, as they probably thought maybe sometime it would go down in history as truly the longest post. If this is the case, then all I would have to do is simply message someone on AIM (or MSN/Yahoo), and then just ask them if they happen to know where it's at. However, most people probably don't know about this post, and therefore they would probably end up directing me to the poster himself, W00ty "big boobs" Jansen, aka "flaming bunker whore". Of course, being the fag I am, I would not want to talk to him on AIM, as I'm sure he's busy going for Bunker 1 Agent 16 or something. So after countless hours of searching through old topics, I will probably just hit nothing. Then, maybe someday I would get the balls to talk to him for once; I mean, he would probably call me a liar a few times as usual, and then be on his way, but I guess it would be worth a shot; all I would have to do his hurry up and ask him, before you calls me gay and blocks me or something.
However, I have seen wooty on 2 different screen names; one of them may not be the real Wouter. I would have to determine this by asking Wouter something only he would know, but then again, I wouldn't know the real answer, so there would be no real way for me to determine which one is real. Still yet again, they could both be Wouter Himself, in which case I would probably waste time asking people which is which. But what if neither of the two are Wouter?
What if the real Wouter Jansen didn't really have AIM? I mean, maybe he comes on and updates his times page, but another character created the Wouter Jansen screen name on here? He could have faked Wouters whole life, and he could just be sitting there doing nothing, getting all the fame and glory, while the real Wouter is out there playing his ass off getting good times, and then not knowing there was a board to discuss his crazy times on.
Back to the point; Wouter's long post. I could go about using the search function; there is a small chance that Wouter might have made the title of it with the word "long" in it. Of course, this would probably only bring up stuff about my penis, but then again, there is that small chance that Wouter made the title of his post "Long post" or something. If nothing comes up, I would probably presume my search through ancient topics, day in and out, searching through every forum, every board, and hopefully one day, I would find the post. Of course, I've never actually seen it, so you know, it could be 45 pages long. I would probably not want to read it; usually when I see long posts in the TS2 boards (if they ever get posts) I just skip them and call the person who posted it a fag (because the longest posts come from snoozer). However, in this case, the supposed-longest post came from Wouter, and we all know the deal with him; he's not a fag, he's a lesbian! Which means, maybe snoozer is a lesbian? No, this can't be true. Then I guess that all this time Wouter has been lying; he's actually a fag. It's sad but true; Flaming Jansen, what a shame.
A simple link, of course, would help me out, and if WJ happens to have the link to this extremely long post of his, I would love to witness the aesthetic beauty of his usual narcissistic posts.
And you know, speaking of which, that reminds me of this next story.
I was 8 years old; wait, I think I was 9. No, maybe i was 7...anyways, I was walking down the street, just walking....walking...yep, still walking. And then all the sudden; I was walking down the street. Walk, walk, walk. I turned a corner, and to my surprise; I was walking down another street! I kept on walking. Great story, huh?
Since we are on the topic of perfect dark (actually we aren't), I would just like to point out that my friend has fixed the cord to my 64, so it should work properly. The only thing stopping me from showing my true work-of-art-runs is a controller. I can't seem to find controllers here; there are no stores that sell them at all, and it gets on my nerves. I guess the only way to get a controller anymore is to buy it from a friend or buy it from ebay. E-bay takes a while to get it, so I think I should buy one from my friend. Actually, since my friend doesn't use his anymore, I'm sure he might just give it to me for free. I mean, the kid has a PS2 now; he doesn't even use that! Let alone the 64...
Now that we are on the subject of PS2, let's talk about Timesplitters. I was hoping more people would join the Timesplitters Elite. (Not Timesplitters 2). This is currently run by thegame, and he is doing a very good job, might I add. There are only a few people who are in the rankings (4 or 5 right now), but soon there should be more, which is why we need YOU to join us! The strafing in that game is a bit weird/random, maybe it has to do with which version you use; there seems to be 2 versions of the game, and I think there is a regular version and then a "Platinum" version. I'm not sure of the differences, or how to tell which is which, but I'm sure there are 2 versions. What's the point have having 2 versions? Was something major changed? If so, then what? I would like some answers to these questions. Also, the strafing is like, random. When you first start off, you can go pretty fast. But after a few runs, it seems like you can't strafe as fast. If you want to strafe fast again, you have to reset the whole game, which takes like an hour, because you have to put in the memory card manager disc and all that other crap. That's why I need one of those memory cards that my friend has, you don't need the memory card manager disc! It's so cool, I wonder where he got his from? Does anyone else have one?
Ohh yea, if you are interested in joining the TSE, look
here for the times and stuff,and it has the link to join, and the link to the forum that we are trying to get TSE people to use to post times and stuff.
Please, do join! I think the game is great, well, at least the challenges; I had most of the WRs at one point, until this super-strafe crap was found, and now it seems like snoozer and chris do it very consistenly (as in, that's the only strafe they do), and thegame has also had very much luck with it. Speaking of him, he came back from behind me, and passed my total time by well over 1:15...pretty good, I must say; one day I hope to drop a lot of time off of my current scores if I could figure out that damn strafe. One day.
Anyways, if you are looking at the rankings right now, you will probably see me with all 27 challenge records; wake up people! ENTER YOUR SCORES! I want to see some challenge scores in! Not just my first completions! I'm sure some people out their have every one of those scores beat! Enter those times in! I want some competition! Not in Story, as I have all but given up on that.
So like, if you even *thought* about reading *any* of that, you are gay.
I really hope this was longer than wouters post, as I just made this all up from the top of my head, and it took like a whole 5 minutes to type.
Edit: Damn, one of clarks posts up there ^ took up almost the same amount as this! That's because he has quotes, those take like 40 extra lines
